This month (September 2003) we talk to Victoria Freeman.

Victoria has been a member of the Kancha Center Sangha since November 2000. She has had the opportunity to work in many different types of employment in her life, and has travelled and lived in a number of interesting countries. She is enrolled in the Teacher Training Program, and has been to many Festivals with Geshe Kelsang.

When were you first attracted to Buddhism?

Before I was born into this life, I believe! In this life, I remember when I was in college I came across a book written by a Tibetan monk. It was quite fascinating, so I read all thirteen books written by this extraordinary being and then went on to read a large number and a great variety of books for many years after that. In fact, I am still reading, but now I have found Geshe Kelsang's books and focus on those alone. Right from the first moment of reading that first book, I felt 'at home' and familiar with Tibet.

What made you come to this Buddhist Center?

I had driven by our previous center many times. It was an art gallery at that time, and I had always thought that I would visit this gallery one day. Finally, I decided to stop and go in one Saturday, but (fortunately, for me) the gallery was closed. Then, I noticed the little house next to the gallery and the sign that said 'Kancha Buddhist Center.' As Wordsworth would say, "My heart leapt." I had been yearning to return to the spiritual path for a long time. I had been sidetracked for so long, I felt, embroiled in the ordinary world of samsara. And, suddenly before me was THE PATH reappearing after so long and right at the best possible moment. I went over to the little house, and amazingly enough it was open on a Saturday afternoon. I went in, and there were very kind and welcoming people there who gave me the schedule and encouraged me to return. I have not stopped going to the center since then!

Were you apprehensive about coming? What did you expect?

I think the previous answer makes it clear that I was quite the opposite of apprehensive. I was thrilled. I found exactly what I expected -- teachings to guide me on the Spiritual Path and wonderful, loving fellow travellers to help me along the way.

What were your first impressions when you arrived?

There are so many things that appealed to me that I cannot name them all. But, the gentleness with which the teachings are given shows such care and tenderness. There is no pushing, no insistence, only acceptance and understanding. We all arrive at the center with different levels of understanding and need. Through our wonderful teachers, Kadam Lucy and Kadam Nick, and indirectly from Geshe Kelsang himself, we are all cared for with great love and compassion. If someone simply wants to meditate in order to relax a bit from the stress of everyday life, that is fine. And, if others wish to pursue the teachings in more depth, they have only to ask for guidance.

What did you like best about coming here?

At the risk of repeating myself, I felt that I had finally come HOME. I had found my way through the dense forest of delusions to the place where I could begin to see the light of wisdom again.

How would you explain the benefits of meditation to someone new?

One hardly knows where to begin to describe the benefits of meditation! Even if one is not particularly interested in Buddhism, there are now so many medical studies being published that praise the results of calming the mind and becoming focused within ourselves. I believe each of us has within ourselves the solution to all our problems, but we will never find this answer until we become very still and LISTEN with all our attention. Meditation teaches us how to help ourselves achieve happiness and our full potential.

How has what you have learned here made a difference in your everyday work and home life?

Simply put, I am happy all the time. And, when one is happy, as we all know, everything in the world around us changes for the better. We are more patient, more loving, more giving. This makes all those around us happier, too.

What do you feel that Buddhism can offer to the world today?

As Geshe Kelsang has said many times, and as many other great teachers and enlightened beings have also said, there will be no peace in this world until we all find peace within ourselves. Even though many religions and spiritual paths lead us in this same positive direction, I find that Buddhism actually gives us a step-by-step method to achieve these goals. It is one thing to talk about love and peace, but it is quite another thing to actually show people how they can achieve this goal.

What is your favorite Kadampa Buddhist quotation?

Of course, there are so many, but I love the part in our sadhana when we say, "In the space before me is the living Buddha Shakyamuni."

I have the most beautiful feeling that Buddha Shakyamuni is sitting right there in front of me and that Geshe Kelsang is there, too. And, then all of the other Holy Beings begin to emerge. I feel as if I could just stop right there and experience the extraordinary bliss of their presence without saying another word. The Holy Beings are always with us at every moment, all we have to do is open our hearts. The prayers help us to do this in such a beautiful way.

What is your favorite Dharma movie?

Well, now that I think about Dharma all the time, there is not one movie or one thing in my life that does not teach me a lesson. Every moment of every day is a lesson to me; even if it is just to realize how deceptive samsara is, and how it keeps us trapped in the prison of our own minds.

What is your favorite book by Geshe Kelsang?

I have not yet read all the books by Geshe Kelsang. In fact, every time I read one of his books, I feel as if I should just start over again from the beginning. Each word, each teaching has so many levels of meaning that one could read these books for a life time and just begin to understand. But, if I had to pick one at this moment, I would say Clear Light of Bliss.

With which historical Kadampa Buddhist practitioner do you most identify, and why?

Of course, I do not know them all by any means, but the first one that always comes to mind is Milarepa. I remember long ago when I first read about him. It said in the introduction to the book that just by hearing his name and reading of his life the reader would receive innumerable blessings. I know this to be true. The life of Milarepa shows us that the path to enlightenment is open to anyone who is willing to make the great effort and sacrifice required. No matter what we may have done in our past lives, the way is open for us, but we must do the work ourselves. No one can do this for us. The wonderful thing about Buddha's teachings is that we finally realize that we are responsible for ourselves, for all our sufferings, and for our eventual release from suffering. We are also responsible for all our fellow beings who suffer with us. We can help them by helping ourselves to become an enlightened being.

What aspect of the Bodhisattva's way of life most inspires you?

The most wonderful thing in the world is learning to put others' needs before our own and to trust that if we do this we will find ultimate happiness. I think that it is very difficult for modern people to let go of this idea of the Self. We are bombarded day and night with the idea that we must get ahead of everyone else, and we must have more than everyone else in order to be happy. But, how much is enough? There is never an end to the desires of the Self. When we relinquish this idea, there is such an overwhelming feeling of freedom and liberation, peace and happiness, that our hearts overflow with joy. Happiness flows into us and through us to everyone else. What could be more wonderful?

What is the first thing you are going to do when you become a Buddha?

There is only one thing that will happen. As a Buddha, I will be like the sun sending out infinite rays of golden, blissful, compassionate, positive energy rays of light to all sentient beings everywhere forever and forever.